Soul Inspiration – How Perception Shapes Judgement

We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are. I was recently accused of being hypocritical. It happened when I suggested to someone that they see a financial advisor, even though I don’t use one myself. The situation got me thinking. My money circumstances are different from this person’s. While I may not have the same income, assets, debts, and expenses as they do, I feel secure in my financial position. I don’t feel the need to consult a financial advisor.

But I saw that they were struggling, and I believed that seeking expert advice could help them reach their goal of financial freedom. So, does that make me a hypocrite?

In all my years in the fitness industry, I’ve always worked within my scope of practice. If someone came to me and said, “I have type 1 diabetes and need help with food,” I would tell them I’m not the right person to help them with that. I could offer exercise guidance, but I would refer them to a dietitian or diabetes specialist for their nutrition needs. Similarly, if a client had an injury, I’d advise them to see their GP or a physio.

If I don’t have the knowledge, qualifications, or experience, I refer people to those who do. In my mind, that’s not being hypocritical—it’s being responsible. What does it really mean to be hypocritical? The general definition is ‘the practice of claiming to have moral standards or beliefs that one’s actions don’t reflect.’ But what I’ve come to realize is that hypocrisy isn’t always black and white. It can be a matter of perspective, and different people may interpret it in various ways.

In my case, I recommended that someone consult a financial advisor because they expressed a desire for financial freedom and admitted to having trouble sticking to a budget. I don’t personally see a financial advisor because I feel confident in managing my own finances. Does this make me a hypocrite? To some, it might seem that way. But for me, this wasn’t about doing something I wouldn’t do myself—it was about recognizing that their situation required expertise I couldn’t provide.

I believe true hypocrisy is when you preach something you don’t practice. For example, if I told someone to hire a financial advisor but secretly refused to follow a budget myself, that would be hypocritical. But offering someone advice tailored to their specific needs—needs that are different from mine—is simply acknowledging that they might benefit from support I don’t require in my current situation.

This experience made me reflect on how differently we all perceive words like “hypocrisy,” and how those perceptions can lead to misinterpretation. The person who accused me of being hypocritical likely saw my recommendation through the lens of their own struggles. Perhaps they interpreted my advice as saying, “You’re not good enough to manage this alone,” when my intent was to guide them toward a resource that could help them achieve the financial freedom they desire.

It’s easy to see how our experiences shape our interpretations of others’ words. What I meant as supportive, they heard as critical. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to help them—it was that I knew my expertise had limits, and referring them to an expert was the most responsible thing I could do.

It made me realize that clear communication is crucial, especially when advising others. It’s not just about the words we use, but how they’re received, interpreted, and understood by the person hearing them. This experience has encouraged me to be more mindful about how my words may be perceived by others, even when my intentions are good.

The situation also led to some personal growth. It forced me to rethink how I approach difficult conversations and recommendations. I’ve always prided myself on staying within my scope of practice, whether it’s in fitness, health, or even financial advice. But I learned that it’s not enough to simply offer well-meaning advice—you have to consider how the person on the other end is receiving it.

Our words are powerful, but their impact is ultimately shaped by how they’re interpreted. This experience reminded me of the importance of empathy in communication. Not just saying the right thing, but understanding how it might be heard or felt by someone who is in a different emotional or mental space.

I now make an effort to clarify my intent, and when offering advice or a referral, I take a moment to ensure the person understands why I’m suggesting it, and how it aligns with their needs and goals. Communication isn’t just about speaking; it’s about bridging the gap between what’s said and what’s understood.

Ultimately, this experience was a reminder that perceptions and definitions vary from person to person. What one may view as hypocritical, another may see as responsible or professional. We all have different experiences that shape how we interpret situations, and it’s important to stay open to that understanding.

I encourage you to think about moments in your life where you may have felt misunderstood, or where you’ve misinterpreted someone else’s words or actions. What shaped those perceptions? How could clearer communication or understanding of each other’s intent have changed the outcome?