Soul Inspiration – Reflection

Have you ever taken a moment and reflected on how far you’ve come?

Six months into the year and I am not where I expected to be but I have accepted that where I am is right where I am meant to be.

At the beginning of the year I chose my word for the year, BUILD. The goal was to build my relationship, build my career, build my reputation with my new name, build my business, build my speaking and build on my health and fitness.Now, a few of these areas are going great. I’ve legally changed my name back to my maiden name, Spears. It took a while to do but I got most things changed into my new name. I’m getting use to introducing myself as Tracy Spears again and signing my name. 

My relationship is amazing. I’m so in love and happy. We are growing together and learning more about each other every day. In the last 12 months I’ve learnt a lot about myself, about relationships in general and the male species. I have to say, men really are from mars and when you look deep down they’re all the same. 

From the author of Men are from Mars & Women are from Venus, John Grey, says ‘Men and women show love in different ways – and love thrives when we accept our differences’.

Now my partner and I are very different in many ways but we want the same things in life.

The author says ‘When a man feels needed by his partner, he’s motivated to be the best he can be. He is no longer selfish; instead, he acts out of true care, not for personal gain. On the other hand, a woman is motivated by care and validation. When she feels cherished by her partner, she has more love to give.’

‘Relationships become easier when couples understand each other’s six primary love needs. The author offers a list. For men, these needs are trust, acceptance, appreciation, admiration, approval, and encouragement. Women, for their part, need caring, understanding, respect, devotion, and validation.’

‘These primary love needs work together. One encourages another.’

If you’re wanting to improve your relationship or start a new one, my encouragement to you is start by looking in the mirror and understand your male counter part, they’re all brothers.

Under my word for the year, Build, was to build my career and business. When I chose this word I was working as a growth coach for the Speakers Institute and wanted to move up as a coach and a facilitator. After 12 months I discovered that it wasn’t going to be as a quick of a path way than what I thought it would be.

So I made a decision to leave the Speakers Institute. I loved working with all the amazing people in the SI proximity and learned a lot. I would encourage anyone who wants to improve their speaking skills, confidence and gain clarity around your message to reach out to speakers institute. Plus you’ll be surrounding yourself with really awesome people, proximity is power! 

Jim Rohn said “You are the average of the 5 closet people you surround yourself with”

So choose your proximity wisely. Surround yourself with people who support you, encourage you, bring the best out in you and inspire and motivate you.

I guess what I thought I wanted at the time was not really what the universe had in mind for me. I was there to learn and that’s what I did and now I can utilise those skills and knowledge on my next pathway with no regrets. 

Another decision I made in the first half of the year was to close my business and get a full time job. This decision was not taken lightly. I have been a sole trader for nearly 17 years, it gets lonely. Closing my business was a decision I had been procrastinating on since second lockdown.

I changed locations (several times) cut back on hours, focused only on group pt, yoga and Pilates and yet still avoiding the decision which I knew in my heart what I wanted and so did the universe.

When you focus on avoiding making a decision, you have that energy inside you, so the universe will make it for you and when the universe guides you to make a decision, it can present situations or people that you might think are out to get you and it can be a  hard lesson to learn but know you are being guided in the right direction. 

“Where focus goes energy flows”

So after a few hard lessons, sleepless nights and a some tears I found myself in a position I’ve never been in before, unemployed. 

At first it was fun. I kept myself busy by redesigning my website, working out, cleaning and whatever else I could do to keep my mind busy. 

In between my activities I was applying for jobs, again something I haven’t done in a very long time. After a few unsuccessful applications I scored myself a personal training job. 

Wait I need to back track a little here, while I still had my business and procrastinating on closing down I had been applying for jobs as a gym manager. I got a job as manager for a new franchise opening in the local area, any way long story short, I got the job with no start date, and then in got pushed back because of legalities and then fell through altogether. I was very disappointed but another lesson from the universe right. That made me more determined to keep looking. So I kept applying for more jobs as gym manager.

Like I mentioned earlier I scored a job as a PT, something I didn’t want to go back to full time but desperate times were calling for drastic measures. 

Any way, I started at the new PT job and it felt like I had taken 10 steps back in my career, it felt like I was starting all over again especially when you start at ‘Rookie’ level. Don’t get me wrong I’m grateful for the experience, it kindly reminded me of things I had forgotten and gave me a push to continue to go after what I really wanted. 

I was there two weeks and then scored myself a new job, this time it was what I wanted. I got a job as the gym manager at Club Lime. I’m really excited about this new journey. 

If you’ve kept reading this long, Thank you! It’s always good to reflect on your journey because you can always learn some great lessons:

• Never forget how far you’ve come.
• I am worthy of having everything I want.
• Think before reacting
• Everything happens for a reason and you are divinely guided.
• Life doesn’t happen to you, it happens for you.
• Persistence pays off

Now some of you might be thinking, what changed to make me close my business. Yes being in business over 16 years is a long time, as a sole trader it gets lonely and you know what, I want more out of life than just business. I got tired of the hustle, the up and down in income and insecurity. 

What really changed was my values shifted. Relationship & Love moved into poll positions 1 & 2 and business and success moved way down the list. I met someone who has brought me out of my shell and opened my eyes to a whole new world and I want more of that. 

For far too long my focus was on my business. It took its toll on my old relationship, my mindset and my health. 

Don’t get me wrong I love what I do, I just want to do it differently now.

My word for the year still remains the same, BUILD, however, what I build now has taken a new direction.

For the rest of the year my goal is to build myself as a leader in Women’s Health and Wellness, build my career in Club Lime, build my health and fitness and of course continue to build my already amazing relationship.